I have a little Westie who is 17 years old. I have never owned a dog before and need all of your advise.
Bobby has been slowing down this past year. He's had periods of incontinance, is sleeping lots more throughout the day, and sometimes, just sometimes, he falls down upon rising. He has trouble getting up the one step from the porch into the house and I pick him up to bring him in when this happens. He does not appear to be in pain and isn't whining like it's arthritis or joint ache. He just falls sometimes. This morning when I let him out I had to pick him up to bring him back in because he couldn't get up the step. He usually follows me from the shower to my powder room and stays close to my feet when I'm putting on make up. This morning he stayed curled up on the bathroom floor next to the shower. When I sat down to take him in my arms he looked at me long and hard in the eyes. I have not seen this look before. It was long. There was poignance to it. He is not feverish or in distress. My vet has seen these sinking spells and says it's due to old age. That look he gave me this morning nearly killed me. It was as though he was telling me something. I don't think I want to hear it. I am tearing up just typing this. Tell me. When is it "time". I've had the same vet for 17 years and he is great. I know he would come to the house for whatever I decide. I've gone on line to see what others have done. That "look" that Bobby gave me this morning seems very common among dog owners.
What have you done? How do you know it is time? Have you waited till your doggy is really ill? I have no small chidren in my home so the only person I need to explain this to is my own heart.
I need to hear your wisdom.
Thank you

{{{{ hugs }}}}

It's time to let go when their is no life left in their eyes.

I think you know the answer deep down inside.


Thinking of you both.

Dawn

My heart aches for you.
I have been in this situation several times. I have always wanted my "babies" to pass in peace and comfort and at home if possible.
Within the last year I had a cat who was exhibiting similar behavior. One evening she seemed to be particularly lethargic. I spent the night on the floor next to her bed telling her how much I loved her and if she needed/wanted to go, I gave her my permission--although it was breaking my heart.
The next morning I KNEW that she didn't have long and appeared to be in distress. My husband and I took turns just cuddling her and trying to keep her comfortable.
With heavy heart I called the vet. I had just hung up the phone when my husband said "I think she's gone"
And she was. She had passed on cradled in his arms.

Your beloved pet may be asking you for your permission to leave.
Remember, when YOU pass from this life, all your beloveds--INCLUDING this little doggie--will be there to greet you.

At 17 he has lived a long life. That is a good life span for a small dog like a Westie. It might be his time to go, he might be ready to let go and is trying to tell you. You can be thankful that he doesn't appear to be in any sort of pain, isn't going through any obvious illness, and that is a blessing for you both.

I haven't been through the death of a dog - but I know when the time comes it's not going to be easy for me.

I think the best thing for you to do at this point, is to make him comfortable. Don't let him 'feel' you sad, that causes them anxiety. Just support him. Pick him up like you have been. Maybe take him for a little stroll at the beach, you can put him in a little wagon, or ride him in the car - do whatever you have to in order to make these times significant and enjoyable for you both.

He may have more in him than you know - animals can surprise us sometimes.

If he stops eating and drinking water, then you know the time has come. Call the vet so that he's not uncomfortable in any way - and allow it to take place peacefully. If he isn't sick, I'd suggest letting him pass at home rather than the vets. It's less stressful for them.

Please keep us posted.

I sympathize. My old wolfhound is getting close to that point too.

I just go by whether or not I feel they are still getting some enjoyment out of life. If they still seem interested in things, still wag their tails sometimes--stuff like that. If they keep having that sick look in their eyes which means pain or constant discomfort and there's no medicine to help it then I think it's time.

I'm so sorry, Cynthia. I avoided having a pet again for a long time because I knew that someday I would face this, too.

I have seen this look from several people dear to me. I did not know it until later; now I know it when I see it. It's knowing they are leaving, knowing that goodbye is coming, knowing that you will be left behind. Giving permission to leave helps make the cords less persistant, so that you both can accept what you know will come: a separation.

Animals have a rich emotional life. They also communicate with us and this is to their credit, not ours... we are so reliant on speech and the crudest of body language. Animals experience energy, thought, emotion. Their lives are rich. Sometimes we are close enough and our love is deep enough so that we actually "get it."

I believe that if you allow Bobby all your love and let him know you'll be okay, he will fall asleep on his own.

Your incite and experience is invaluable to me. I've been able to internally regroup based on your comments. Bobby is not in pain, and the look he gave me this morning showed awareness and total trust but not discomfort. Maybe sadness. He will be sleeping when I return home but I am hoping for a tail wag. I know this ending is inevitable. It's just
heartwrenching.
Plus there's enough Roman Catholic left in me to believe that, now that my daughter is blessedly okay, there must be a sacrifice within short order.

I unfortunately didn't get to say goodbye to my beloved doggie - he died very suddenly and quickly last January, in the arms of my BF while I was frantically driving to the vets. It was excruciatingly painful feeling that loss, but in retrospect I am glad he didn't suffer long and we were with him when he went.

I trust that Bobby will let you know when he is ready to go. It sounds as if he's not quite ready yet. Enjoy every moment with him and savor his presence, knowing that some day you will be reunited in joy.

(((((Lmatchgrl))))) I'm so sorry, dear.

My Maltese..........lost weight and I didn't notice because she was all fur. Then...........one day she stayed in my closet with her nose in my shoes. I took her to the vet but .........I put her down. She had jaundice and was "on the way out." She had no life left in her. SAD!

I'm sorry. You're blessed that you've had her so long! 17 years is a long time. My Maltese was only 11 I think.

My dog, Allyson, is going to be 16. She's slowed down a bit, but still looks forward to my coming home, stilll craves my undivided attention, and lives to eat. Not a morsel of food is consumed in this house without Ally somehow managing to show up for any scrap that may fall her way. She did go through a period of "leaking", but there is medication that the vet can give you for that. She is also more attached than she used to be--follows me absolutely everywhere.

When my cat John was sick, last year, I knew it was time when he just couldn't eat. Because John was a rescue cat--my son and his girlfriend found him and brought him to me--his favorite activity was eating. I guess he was trying to make up for the leaner days of his life. However, once John could eat barely a morsel of food, I knew his time had arrived. The night before we took him to the vet, he really had no sense or control of either his bowels or bladder. In addition,he was vomiting. The next morning he was fine, but just the thought of his going through any more suffering was worse than the thought of losing him.


It sounds to me as if your dog is not in pain, not suffering, but is just slowing down. You will know when it is time to let your dog go, and if your vet is as good as you say he is, he will let you know when it's time. Just be prepared. I had never gone through this type of thing before. It was far more traumatic than I had believed it was going to be. I knew I'd be sad, but it was really a sense of loss that I felt.

Good luck to you. Many of us here on POL have been through this, so I hope it helps to know that you have alot of support. I know it helps me to picture all of our beloved pets, just hanging around the Rainbow Bridge--without pain, and able to chow down just as much as they want.


Pam

Lots of good advice here. Just hugs from me, lmatchgirl. They are so very dear, aren't they?

I never knew animals got jaundice until my cat died of it. She had an acute form and was constantly meowing in pain. I had no choice. For that reason, I am in no hurry to get another pet. I couldn't go through that experience again.

My Pekingese Lulu was 17 when she died. Lulu slept alot and I had to lift her inside but I felt she was still happy to be here until she got this cough. As my Vet said "That is a cough we do not like to hear" .
Believe it or not Imatchgrl you will know when its time. Use this time now to enjoy your westie (I had a cairn terrier many years ago that got to 16- scotty terriers like your Bobby and my Toby are a great breed with such charactor) . Bobby may be slow now and need your help but he will know you are around and just keep doing the same old things you have done for years - change he will hate.
Give it over to God and your Vet and really, really enjoy his company for now.
Sending my love to you both.

I knew when it was time to put my dog down, I agree that you'll just know. My dog had an inoperable bladder tumor and kidney failure. She was such a gutsy little dog and so full of life, but in pain at the end when her medicine would start to wear off.

It was very hard and I still feel bad about it, but it was the best thing I could do for her then.

I have a 13 year old mini dachshund. When they get to this age they may not hear and see very well so sometimes they get confused about what you are saying to them. Thus that look. I swear sometimes she has dementia. She has a congestive heart and takes medication for it and is doing well. She is on medication for her incontinace and I have mediction for those times she has pain. ( they don't limp they just stop doing things that hurt and have trouble standing sometimes ) Your doggie seems ok so far. Just love him.

(((((((((lmatchgrl)))))))))))))

Oh, it's so hard.

It's hard but you know and you must know. You have to spare them the pain and love them as you approach the end. I have been there and boy is it hard, but it is really about your dog at this point. Hugs to you, I hope you find peace and the right time.

My vet put Bobby to sleep this afternoon. He was in my arms.
Oh my god this is hard isn't it.

Oh, honey yes it is (((((((lmatchgrl))))))))

I'm so sorry.

Oh Imatchgrl - I'd followed this thread and wished well for you and Bobby. It's terribly sad, but you've acted with tremendous compassion - such a difficult decision. What a lucky dog to have had such a long life and to have been so well loved.

Huge hugs to you....

Oh, Matchy, I'm so sorry. Even though you must know it was for the best, it is tremendously hard to lose your furbaby. Hugs to you, dear.

Oh my heart goes out to you. You gave your fur baby a wonderful life and as time goes by you will be blessed with all the wonderful memories of your time together. It's a wise owner who knows when it's time to say good bye. Most people put it off for their own sake. You did good by him.

Thank you all. I can't stop crying today. Your kindness has helped.

QUOTE (lmatchgrl @ May 4 2008, 01:46 PM)

My vet put Bobby to sleep this afternoon. He was in my arms.
Oh my god this is hard isn't it.

I had a white german shepherd named Snowball. I had to put her down, she had hip dysplasia. My vet said that he could operate, but there was no guarantee she would make it, and it would be very costly!

It hurt me to see her in pain as she walked.

She did not like strangers, did not like going to the vet for her shots. When I took her to the vet, she seemed to know what was going on. She even let them inject her without a fuss.

That was about 18 years ago, and my heart breaks and I cry everytime I think of her. I didn't have her as long as you had your lil furbaby, I only had her about 5 years, and she was older when I got her. But I loved her as much as if I had raised her from a pup!

Our Lab is 13 years old. He has already had to have a 20 lb tumor removed, his spleen, & part of his liver & pancreas. I dread him having to go through anything more!

I'm so sorry to read this, lmatchgrl. I am having a hard time right now thinking about losing my Larry-Boy. Please know that you did a very compassionate loving thing for Bobby. I'm sure he is at the Rainbow Bridge and will see you again one day.
I know it seems unlikely now, but one day you will smile and love remembering all the wonderful times you and Bobby shared.

Do you know the Rainbow Bridge poem? Makes me cry, but I do love it.

Rainbow Bridge
Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...


Take care and here's a big hug from me. (((HUG)))

Oh, Matchy. I am sooo sorry. My heart goes out to you. :-((

Matchy - its the hardest thing and yet, the kindest thing you did . My thoughts go out to you.

Bless you for being there for him in his last moments, it was a huge act of love. I know how bad you are feeling, I lost my beloved doggie last January and the pain was intense. Now over a year later I can think of him and smile for the good times we spent together, although I miss him every day. Sending you lots of hugs as you make your way through the sorrow and tears.