There was a hilarious limerick thread on MUA yesterday. Let's play here! Please share yours.

These are the ones I came up with:


The scent shopping, it never ends,

I'm addicted, I cannot pretend,

Though my credit card's moaning,

there's just no atoning,
I've got a lemming for that Serge Lutens!

I must cast off this fragrance ennui...

Maybe incense is the note that I need!

Though it's true, I'm allergic
To all things liturgic,
I think I'll try Messe de Minuit!

We awaited Tom Ford's big debut,
of a niche scent we couldn't refute,

A frag called Black Orchid

all sensuous and torpid,
instead all we got was rotten fruit.

There once was a Mongol in lust
who set out with his pony at dusk
for a wild orgy-fête
where he bottled his sweat,

And yes, Serge gladly sold us his Musc.

There once was a gal called Mitsouko

who needed an olfact'ry logo,
"Jacques, no mere Chypre clone,"

He said, "Undecalactone!"

Et voila, we have peaches-a-go-go.

For a Chypre the sine qua non
is an oakmoss the regs won't condone.

So I was curious to find

That Jacques Polge did not mind

To delete it from his Rue Cambon.

My hat's off to you! Brilliant!

It'll take me all day to thimk up even one....I'll try..........

Bravo, jtc! (Puts thinking cap on.) See ya later!

What fun! Here's one... I'll try to do some more later...

With reformulations abundant,
'Fumistas spend much time recumbent,
We weep for what's dead,
Ahhh…the tears that we've shed!
But those bastards sniff "So? Just get over it".

There once was a stinker named Hoos.
Who spent his time buying up juice.
Till he started to reek,
Overcome by Diptyque!
Now Old Spice is all he can use.

Farnesiana is so
Often compared to Play-Dough.
But I don't give a hoot
'Cuz I think it's a beaut',
If you hate it that just leaves me mo'!

There once was a nice boy called Jake,
Whose parenting skills were quite fake,
Instead of fresh food
His fridge reeked of Black Oud,
And his kids were as thin as a rake!

CUTE!


There was a woman in Shanghai
She needed juice for lullaby
But not what you think
and neither a drink
All she ever wanted was Chopard's Mira-Bai!

*LOL*

Candy was a perfume lover in Quatar
didn't bother spending money on Shalimar
but the sheik forbid to use the scent
found the dollars shoud be spent
on local oudhs from their kasbah.

Once upon a time in Brest
a man bought for himself New West.
His woman, french and very cute
thought, well, it's not that i am mute (or was that anosmic? *G*)
and took a good sniff off his chest.

I LOOOVE Limericks, did i mention?

Each year in May in a nearby alley
a girl sprays all her house with lilly of the valley
her cousins, parents kids and friend
know before and move to a tent
her name, who wonders, rhymes: it's Sally!

There once was a man from Nantucket,

......who purchased his scent by the bucket

There once was a man from Nantucket,
who purchased his scent by the bucket

he bathed and showered every day

You guys are good.


...in Etro Lemon Sorbet

Good save, Terry, fiordiligi and lillie!

"An expensive scent is what you need,"
Slyly sighed the man from Creed.
All I thought was "To heck with you!".
While clutching my Aqua Velva Blue,
I exclaimed "Hie thee to your Irish Tweed!"

A young perfumista called Kate,
Was desperate to go on a date.
She applied Diorella
Soon picked up a fella
Then found out that he wasn't straight!

Undaunted she tried the next night,
Selecting a perfume so right
The poor guy she charmed
Was completely disarmed
And just couldn't put up a fight!

"What perfume was that" you may say,
"That managed to lure him away?"
Well I'll keep that one quiet,
In case you might buy it
And snatch my new boyfriend away!

Brava, kewart!

Our English kiddos really understand the technique of the limerick!

The old Guerlain family in France,
Made perfumes designed to entrance
Then a man named Bernard
Took them to the graveyard
All in the name of finance



Susie was out for a man,
She said "I'll do whatever I can",
To hook him I must,
I'll show him my bust!
Sprayed with L'Occitane Orange Ruban!

These are fantastic! (Still thinking...)

There once was a bachelor, Mel.
Who enjoyed being single – a spell.
A date? He did land it.
By over applying the Bandit.
Now Mel’s got a regular belle.

omg i love these!!!!!!!!

I'm fond of a perfume named Jicky
But some of you find it quite icky
I can't smell the poo
But I know that you do
Oh, the perfumer's art is so tricky

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There's a perfume called Coromandel
From the wonderful house of Chanel
It smells very glamorous
And makes me feel amorous
I'm sure that it's casting a spell

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jane Birkin's an icon in France
With her handbags you haven't a chance
But her perfume's now here
And it isn't too dear
So get supplies in, in advance

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

These are great! I'm having so much fun reading them.

Here is mine:

This is such a fun thread. Loving everyone's limericks so much. I just had to make more.

YSL called his scent Champagne,
the wineries din't like that name,
You must name it different
Cause we have a patent
Oh how they loved to complain.

I'll fix it right now said YS
How did I get into this mess?
They're rules are so strange
I must make the name change
Eureka! I'll call it - Yvresse.

These winos I think I'll outsmart,
I've a bottle design of such art.
For a fragrance of beauty,
Both oakmossed and fruity.
All topped with a champagners cork.

On a island in the big blue sea
long ago they celebrated to the wee
the priestress of the mystery
called out, we're making history:
let's make some 'fume called "chyprieeee"!



OK, it doesn't really rhyme but it's early here! ;-))
And fun!

In a city named Lolita
lived a girl called Habanita.
About her the men were crazy
which came because she was so lazy -
her motto: give me Dolce Vita.

There was once madame VOl de Nuit

She made me forget my Mackie

It will be Eternity

Before I will change her for Shi!

These are great! What a fun read!

Finally, the limerick cells in my brain lined up:

I looked at my perfume tray
It needed a new array
Showing Hermès and Lauder
They are now in order
but how long will this display stay?

Oops, forgot it had to be 5 lines!

Smelka, don't worry about it; keep working on it! I enjoyed your limerick.

I squirted a spritz of Dilys
On top of my yellow chemise
then walked down the street
as men fell at my feet
A peach tease seem key to the Bee's Knees!

I am LAME at LIMERICKS....but I'll give it a try. Love reading these...there are so many talented people here!

From the ocean we get Ambergris
And years pass before it is prime
Perfumistas don't care its "whale vomit"
Nor would we care if it was brine
To our nose its a scented kiss!

As I said, I am lame at limericks, but its all in fun!

Oooooooohhhhh

Eye of newt and wing of bat
A scented potion just for you
Please don't forget the civet cat
I need it for my witches brew
Now....who has my perfumer's hat?

Every Thursday on an isle called Jersey
a girl who has simply no mercy
puts on a spritz of Boucheron
and walks like a queen from her throne
to visit her boytoy named Percy.