I hope that I don't drive slow enough to irritate young little whipper snappers(like myself ) when they get behind me. My husband keeps reminding me....that they really DO need to drive slow because they are old. He said, you wouldn't want people that drive like that to drive fast, now would you?

I hope I don't get on my children's nerves. Heck, I get on them bad enough as it is.

I hope I don't over spray my perfume and walk around like pig pen because I'm old and have lost my sense of smell. I also do that occasionally as it is!

I hope I don't pick my nose while in public or in the privacy of my own vehicle while sitting at a red light!! IF I do, I hope I don't feel the need to inspect what I fished out!

How about you? What do you hope, NOT to do?

I hope I don't get in everyone else's business.

Seconding that one !

I also do not wish to become prissy with age , you know what I am talking about ..... pursed lips and tsking at everyone and everything.

I hope I don't become a burden.

I hope I don't beat some smartaleck kid with my cane.

I hope I don't come to view a trip to the grocery store as a "social outing".

I hope I don't end up living in some group home for elderly misfits.

I hope I don't lose my sense of humor.

I hope I don't overdo the "crotchety old man" bit. Because I am really looking forward to it.

I hope I don't have to live on catfood and saltines.

I hope I don't forget the value of a beautiful day.

Not just smartaleck kids , canes are for smartalecks of all ages .... there has to be something for me to look forward to in growing old

Well, I've been told that I already am old! But when I get older, I hope that I don't...

Become negative and lose my lightness and sense of flexibility

I was going to say, "become reclusive," but I'm already there

Abandon my femininity

Have to live in poverty

Get an old-lady "poodle" cut and perm. Unless I also decide to adopt rhinestone cat's eye glasses.

I hope I don't drive my kids crazy.
I hope I can always do something to keep busy.
I hope I always have my sense of humor.
and...
I hope I never stop hoping.

I hope I don't take up spitting.

Hey, I'm working on being old -- feel pretty danged old, now.
I'm grouchy and don't have much patience with new-fangled contraptions.
I'm set in my ways.
And ya know what? I don't really care.

I hope I don't have a lot of knicknacks and chachkas.
I hope I don't fall into indulging in conversations about ailments and deaths.
I hope I never lose the ability to walk home carrying six bags of groceries from the supermarket (where I've had a heck of a fine social outing reading product labels!) and up three flights of stairs (like I do now)!

uh oh! I'm afraid I ADORE going to Costco!! YIKES!!

I hope I don't ever look my age...

I hope I can open my milk jug!

I tell ya, I worry about older people getting their food open. Some jars,jugs and packages are near impossible to open! If it weren't for my husband, I would have to do without some foods because I would give up the wrestle with them and do withtout!

oh man....I hope I don't end up looking like Bette Davis in 'Whatever happened to Baby Jane'.....need to tone down the red lippy.
MB

Inappropriate post deleted.

Obliviously f-a-r-t as I walk. Tooting with each step. Or, as I heard recently, one long one accompanied by rising from a chair.
God please take me before this ever happens. Please!

*looks side to side in a very guilty fashion*

Complain.

I hope I don't get dementia. I'm now working at a locked Altzheimers unit & its very sad to see someone decline in their mental abilities and lose interest in their former hobbies.

Become so obsessed with bodily functions that I discuss it with people other than my health care providers.

Hate the modern world and pine for a lost time.
Have dentures and click them and fuss them with my tongue.
Really, really dress down.

Yikes, so do I Gloria!!!

I hope I don't lose the ability to adapt to the world as it is (and live in the past and hate younger people).

I hope I don't become bitter and angry and complaining all the time - I visit senior centers and nursing homes regularly and there are many people like this - not ALL though, thankfully, which reminds me it is a choice to be that way.

I hope I care less and less what other people think as I get older.

I hope my body and mind remain intact and functioning well into my older years (and that's why I am doing everything I can, now, to increase my chances that that will happen).

I hope I don't stop caring about my hygiene.

Tell the same story over and over and over and over and over...........

I hope that I'm positive enough that people will want me around.

I really, really hope that I don't become disapproving and judgmental of everyone and everything.
I really, really hope that I don't sit around talking about wishing to go back to the "good old days"! (BIG pet peeve of mine with some of the older folk in my own family!!) I want to stay informed, up-to-date and relevant in all areas of my life!
I really, really, really hope I can keep on doing most of the things I do now insofar as taking care of myself, driving myself wherever and whenever I want to go, working, socializing, traveling, etc. I don't mind the inevitable getting older but I know I would very much mind having to have someone to help me with ADLs especially the hygiene stuff. No way do I want someone else besides me giving me a bath! My great-aunt is an inspiration to me in this area because she lived alone and did what she wanted when she wanted with no major limitations or medical problems every day till she died at the age of 98. She made getting old look too easy, LOL!

I'm already a 36-year-old yenta. I caught myself telling my neighbors "I'm so happy you kids are getting married!". I sounded exactly like my dear Great Aunt Jennie.

I hope I don't...

.... dress in dull colors and shapeless styles

.... stop learning difficult things

.... stop being au courant

.... hole myself away in some artificial "seniors community"

.... start moaning "woe is me, the end is approaching" instead of "yee-haw, another day above ground!"

Incontinence.


On an earlier post on this thread, I expressed this same idea... but slightly more colloquially. Asterisks were used completely in lieu of a vulgarity, but I guess it was still too blunt. The post was deleted and I was issued an Official Warning. Five o' those, y'know, and you're Audi 5000, kids. I'd forgotten that most of us readers here were actually eight-year-olds from a Sunday school in Provo, circa 1957.


Bad! David! Bad!

Stand in corner! Nose in chalk circle!

If that's why you think of the membership, then why bother? Seriously.

On topic: in general terms, I don't want to be a coot, a word that has masculine connotations to me. Is there a feminine equivalent? Suggestions? I used to use the word biddy under my avatar, but that's not quite it.

Hehehe, I feel that way about the world myself sometimes. Be witty, be sophisticated, show your inneleckshul bona fides (Oh the status!) but be PRIM! I'm so glad you had the big blue bouncy things to say it! I know I never did.

And I agree, incontinence is a very good thing to wish to avoid!

mistake and I can't delete it!

Post targeting an individual deleted.

It sounds like you might feel some angst against a certain religious group?

Oh Lord.


Let's have a class. It's called WIT 101. You'll love it, I promise. It's kind of a hoot.

I get it and I enjoy your posts, but still.........

One of the most important skills the mature, educated, seasoned practitioner of a language can have is the ability to recognize and understand the invocation of Tone.

Tone is a subcategory of Wit.

It often involves saying things that one doesn't mean. Really! Because the real meaning is implied, not explicitly iterated, and various cues invariably exist in a witty sentence to indicate to the sensitive, perspicacious, seasoned reader/listener that a "trope" is being invoked.

A "trope" is an example of Wit. Sarcasm and Irony are just two types of Trope, for there are many. Like notes in a perfume. Anacothulon, litotes, bathos, hyperbole are four more rhetorical tropes. Do investigate this excellent webpage! They make for sparkling conversation, and prevent communiques from becoming leaden... too literal... too "black and white". Once we have learned to crawl, we then learn to walk; once we have learned to walk, we then long to dance. Wit is "dancing with words". To take everything one hears or reads literally is (don't tell anyone) actually the mark of the dullard. (Or the stroke victim.)

Wit is so important and useful when people come together, as in this Forum, because its skillful invocation, and reception, prevents people from coming to loggerheads. Because it invokes what the French call the "droit de fou" (the privelege of the court jester to say pointed-- even heated-- things without having his head cut off.)

The most civilized, literate, educated people "agree to disagree", and Wit is the way they do it. Wit is actually a gift, for it is a way of making an ordinary statement more delightful... sometimes even more palatable. If YOU invoke Wit with ME, for example, it is paying me a compliment; you are implying that MY time is valuable, and you are going to get your point across in a succinct, charming and entertaining way! Do you see?

Prick up your ears to notice Wit whenever it occurs... and remember: What's literally said is NOT the exact meaning of the communique'.

Countries who have most valued unfettered Freedom Of Speech-- Britain, France, the USA--- most often have the most scintillating traditions of Wit. Coincidence?

Becoming bitter and outright mean.

No one needs a life filled with venom to eat them up. Just not worth it.

Subject matter counts.

Do what I do...........
Don't hang with people your own age. Hang around with people 10-20 years younger. Keeps you thinking young.

I attended a conference on Baby Boomers this past summer and one of the speakers talked about ways to keep your brain healthy. He said that doing things that are new and challenging help to keep the brain from getting rusty. Some suggestions: learning a new language, learning to play a musical instrument, learning to write with your non-dominant hand, learning sign language, traveling, games and puzzles, and any creative endeavor (writing, painting, sculpting, whatever). I loved that fact that at least one of the speakers emphasized that all is not doom and gloom re: aging. Other important things: spirituality, nutrition, socialization, and physical exercise.

So to keep your brain healthy and "young" keep trying new stuff throughout your life! Plus it's fun! Doctor's orders!

I already am old (62) and these are the things I try to do and not do:
1. I never criticize or offer advice to my children and their spouses unless they ask (and if they ask for advice, I give it gently and with consideration).
2. I never EVER criticize the way they bring up their kids.
3. I dress well and wear makeup and 'fume because it's fun and keeps me young.
4. I am always up for learning something new and constantly set new challenges for myself. (I just earned my LMHC - Licensed Mental Health Counselor - so that I can establish a private practice.)
5. I never assume that I am right just because I am older.
6. I try to keep up with technology. I just learned to bowl with a Wi.
7. I don't talk about my various "illnesses" all the time (and sad to say, you do develop them).
8. I do crossword puzzles and play other games to keep my brain sharp.
9. I have friends of all ages and do not live in a community of only older people.
10. I laugh as often as possible.
11. I subscribe to magazines that keep me "in the know" about fashion and makeup. I enjoy "W", Oprah, Elle, Allure, and others.
12. I do not mourn for the good old days. I remember when abortion was illegal, there was no birth control pill, and there was no internet. I love NOW.
13. I wake up every morning, look outside, and say a silent "thank you" for all the beauty that nature and life provide.
14. I often reflect on what I am grateful for: my family, my beautiful new granddaughter, my friends, my health, my cyberfriends, etc. Life is good!

I suppose "Wit" is in the eye of the beholder. What I think is "witty" and cute you may not find so much and vice versa. As you and I both know "tone" is often difficult to read from a computer. I would hope you are not saying that just because someone doesn't find what you have to say "witty" that they are a dullard or compare them to a stroke victim!? Anyway, it's enough for me now.

I love your rules Clarestella and hope that I can remember them as I age. Sometimes it's so hard to bite my tongue with my married kids.

Well, darling, you're not old enough to be my Mom, but if you were, I'd make a formal request! I think you've said it all.

Rasputin, I hear you. And I heard you, correctly, yesterday, whereas your tone was lost on another, which did surprise me.

I hope that I am surrounded by loved ones, that I am still creative and relevant and learning new things, and that I am mentally and physically spry, strong and flexible.

The invoker of wit always secretly hopes that the recipient will retort with a wit equally-- or more-- engaging/striking/funny, when and if she can. It shows spirit, sociability and good humor. It's like a good tennis game... or dancing a tango. Even if the retort puts the first speaker in a bad light, he is nonetheless thrilled by the gameness of his partner... Hence the oft-heard word (derived from fencing) "Touché".

To wilt, sulk, weep and flee is the repertoire of a schoolyard child, and doesn't give observers an engaging show.

I don't think Ems was fleeing, nor do I think she behaved like a schoolyard child. She had her say and doesn't see the need for the last word, the antithesis of schoolyard behavior. I do think I perceive some sulking going on upthread, however.

I remember when the gang and I had younguns , very few of the kiddles would away sulk or flee , they would , in fact very publicly make quite the engaging show of it Thankfully they all recovered from this awkward phase by the age of four.

I volunteered at the Sunday social hour at a nursing home, and while it was a lovely place and the residents were all kept busy and relatively happy, let me just say -

by the time I'M ready to go live at an old folk's home, I hope the music they play at the social hour will be updated a few decades beyond Lawrence Welk and The Biggest Hits of the 1940's! A lot of the residents weren't THAT old ... When I go live there, I guess some Elvis would be good, and the Beatles would be soothing and familiar at the sing-along. You're never too old to rock and roll! ... I don't want people visiting me and hearing me complain about my roommate, Ashley, listening to Celine Dion when I'd rather listen to Led Zeppelin, LOL!

I hope I don't become a crazy cat lady and after I pass away whoever handles my estate or whatever also has to find homes for my pets. I think that's so sad. But I can see myself with a whole bunch of furry little friends....