Hi Sweethearts,

I just wanted to let you know that I had to stay absent for the past six month since I took care of my beloved grandma who raised me. We lived together in the same house. She died some weeks ago of a horrid anaplastic thyroid cancer, which is about the rarest but most aggressive form of cancer. The tumor had been removed and she had to have a tracheostomy, but five weeks after it was all back again!!! Although she reached her 90th birthday in her last few days, she was in such a good shape than none of us would have ever expected her to die that soon. Since my grandma was an extremely powerful and energetic woman (we used to call her "The Chief" or "The General") it is so very sad to see somebody who helped you all your life to become more and more helpless each day. My daughter was also suffering because I didn't have much time for her and we couldn't leave the house if nobody else was there because grandma couldn't be left alone. Luckily we could bring her to palliative care when the tumor got totally out of control, so she could get an adequate treatment with morphines etc. The people working there are amazing - they do everything to give comfort to those poor people in their final stages of cancer or other uncurable illnesses. I was allowed to sleep there too.
Usually I went back home to my family in the evening, but one night my sister and I decided to stay overnight. That was good for us, because after all of her terrible sufferings, the General passed away with her two grandchildren at her side and we know for sure that she left very peacefully. Few hours later in the morning the nurses had covered her with flowers and the sun was shining on her face, and she looked like she had definitely gone to heaven! Of course I played her some decent farewell on the trumpet at the church....
I hope the attachment works, it's grandma at age 82 with two of her grandgrandchildren. And now I'll close with one of her statements:

"Kopf hoch, auch wenn der Hals schwarz ist!" which is about "Wear your head up high, even when your throat is dirty"

Hugs to all of you, Annette

Click to view attachment

Oh Jazztweety, I am so sorry. Such a tremendous, painful loss - there is nothing like a grandmother's love. I hope that the memories of her love for you will come to be a comfort to you. Thank you for including the pic, your grandmother was beautiful. My sincere condolences - love, Terry

Dear Jazztweety,

Sincere condolences to you and your family on the loss of your beloved and lovely grandma. What a beautiful tribute you have written. I am sure Grandma is smiling on you and watching over you as you watched over her.

I'm truly happy for you that you had the precious time together with your wonderful GRAM! I loved mine too. Such strength is very evident in her pictures. I'm sorry for your loss but it sounds like she gave you an awful lot.

My deepest sympathy. I was very, very close to my maternal grandmother. Essentially, she raised me. Love the photo . . .

Awww, Jazzy...you have warmed my heart in such an amazing way with your story. I am so very sorry for your loss, sweetie. Welcome back, and thank you so much for sharing.

So sorry to hear of your Grandmother's passing, Jazztweety. Your story brought tears to my eyes. I'm sure she is smiling down at her beautiful granddaughters who loved and cared for her so dearly in her time of need. Thanks for posting your Grandma's picture...what a pretty woman. Glad you're back at POL. Take care. ~ Lisa

Oh, Annette, what a wonderful departure for your darling grandmother. You and your sister gave something beautiful to the whole world in so tenderly seeing your grandmother through the door.

My grandmother also (at 4'11" - whatever that little height is in centimeters) was called The General by her friends. But they never had the nerve to call her that name to her face! She was well loved and had many friends, but really had a commanding presence.

Welcome back. I'll remember your beautiful granny in my prayers.

God Bless Grandmothers.
Special prayers for your Gran.

sillage

I am so sorry for your loss,

Your grandmother and your children are beautiful. Her eyes are amazing.

So sorry for your loss, jazztweety.

I am very sorry.

I'm so sorry Jazztweety. You were so lucky to have such a wonderful grandmother. And she was so lucky to have you.

I'm very sorry.

I'm very sorry for your loss. It sounds as if you had a wonderful relationship with her, she had a full life, and she was blessed to have you and your sister with her to the end.

We're glad you're back with us!

I'm sorry, Annette. It sounds like you gave her the best possible passing. Thanks for telling us a bit about her.

I am sorry for your loss. Lovely to see you back.

I am so sorry for your loss, ((((((Annette)))))).

Your grandmother and you were both blessed...with each other.
Thank you for sharing with us, a little bit about her...
I am glad to see you back here. You have been missed, dear.

What a wonderful picture of your Grams. Many blessings to you for faithfully looking after her until the end. I have great respect for families who honour their own in this way.

I love hearing tough grandmother stories, although I am sorry about your loss and what you had to see her go through. 90 years. She sounds she was a great example to the family. You will have so much to remember her by.

Hugs to you.

I am sorry for your loss.

Annette you are so fortunate to have had such a wonderful grandmother. The memories you have of her will live with you forever and the time you shard was a gift. I am so very sorry for your loss. Please take care.

I am sorry for your loss. Your Grandmother sounds a wonderful woman.

I'm sorry that you've lost your Grandmother. What a strong and self assured woman she appears from the photo.

Grandmothers are truly a gift, my maternal Grandmother was a second mother to me and I miss her everyday. Your Grandmother as "the General" made me realize people called my Grandmother "the Boss". How wonderful to have such a strong woman in your life.

You are in my prayers and thoughts:-)

Good to see you back, jazz. I'm so sorry to know that your Grammy has passed.

I'm very sorry for your loss - it's always incredibly hard to see someone you love go through such pain... nevertheless, I'm glad the end was so dignified, and I'm happy to see you back here!

Annette, please accept my sympathy for your terrible loss. What a formidable woman she must have been! I know you will miss her terribly.

We are glad to see you back here, although I wish the circumstances were better!

(((((((((jazztweety))))))))))

Laura

Schön, Dich wieder zu lesen und auch traurig...
Annette, die Beschreibung hat mich so sehr an meine Oma erinnert, sie ist gerade 80 geworden... ! Die Frauen dieser Generation können/konnten uns sehr viel beibringen! Ich fühl(t)e mich ihr oft näher als meiner Mutter.
Danke für Deine Offenheit und ... meine Gedanken sind bei Dir.
Nina

What a shame, jazztweety... You'll miss her. But we've missed you here, and it's nice to have you back!

I am sorry for your loss. I'm glad you have decided to come back to POL :O)

Annette, so sorry to hear about your loss. Good to have you back though. I have missed you :)

*hugs* ... Lotte

Deeply sorry for your loss....

Was wondering where you were, pity it was somethig so tragic that kept you away.
Cherish the time you spent together. She sounds an amazing woman.

Jazz, I'd been wondering where you where. So sorry to hear about the loss of your beloved Gram. I'm glad you were able to be with her at the end. May you find comfort in the love you shared and the memories you hold dear.
Hugs,
Tambri

I am so sorry Annette my dear.

I'm sorry, Jazztweety. Please know that I'm thinking of you.

I am sorry about the loss of your beloved Grandmother. My grandmother was German too, and although it never occurred to call her the General, it would have been a fitting nickname. :-) The photo of your grandma was lovely, I am glad you have so many happy memories of her. May her memory be a blessing.

All you lovelies,

thank you so much for your very warm hearted and comforting words! To be honest, I started getting a little desperate at home with everybody and his brother telling me that 90 years is a good age to reach! Of course it is right, and I have seen mothers of little children younger than me in uncurable stages of cancer in the same hospital, which is about the saddest thing you can imagine - but you just can't compare your own situation with worse things happening and just pretend to feel great because others are doing worse. This is a reasonable attitude, but I am not reasonable when I have lost and suffered with somebody who helped me all my life and I could not help!!! Isn't it amazing that quite a few of us have "Boss" grandmas - it seems to be the old generation while some of our mothers might go for more self realisation? Even if I usually do not post private things I knew that all of you are loving and caring people. My deepest gratitude to all of you, and big hugs, Annette

So sorry to hear of your great loss, Annette! Your Grandmother's eyes have tremendous spirit and strength shining through them.

jazztweety, I come from what used to be a very matriarchal family, too. My paternal grandmother was really a sort of "mother hen" to all of us... she loved all her kids and grandkids.... I think she cared more about us than she did for herself. When she died in 1977 at only 53 (!), it was as though the central fulcrum of the family was suddenly gone.

But your grandmother's DNA is in your blood, and a part of her plays through you every time you bring the trumpet to your lips...



xoxoxox, D.

She will always be with you, those kind remain a guiding angel. Bless you.

Love and compassion to you, Tweets, I've missed you, glad to see you've returned.